I have been stressed about finding the right ring. The perfect ring. Buying expensive things does not come easy to me. The pursuit of once in a lifetime, perfect thing just makes it worse. And, of course, I don’t like taking too much time making decisions. This trifecta of dilemmas plague me time and again. I often write about it but it does not lead to an easier predicament next time around. I wonder what I could do differently.
Perhaps, I could start out by accepting that these decisions are tough for me. I could acknowledge that this decision might not be perfect and more importantly, chasing perfection is a never ending and pointless pursuit in the long run. I could also give up on trying to hope for a different response and accept my response to certain situations. And, in the light of my limitations, what is the most appropriate course of action.
For instance, in the case of my ring, I do not feel comfortable buying something too expensive. I know that most people search hard and buy expensive rings as the symbol of their undying love. For me, a ring is just a symbol. Do I care about the size or the rock or the price tag or how expensive it looks? No. I do like buying pretty things. I am not sure if I will always like to wear it. I think rings are a reminder of gestures/life events. Like the green and black ring reminds me of my mom and the platinum rins is a gift from my Dad.
I liked the moonstone ring Arpit and I got from Jiju. It was pretty and more than that, it was a relief to worry about another thing. Perhaps, another day and time, when I care about and know more about rings, I will buy a different one. Perhaps, I will ask Arpit to surprise me with a ring sometime somewhere. Perhaps, buying rings and jewelry will never be my thing. Maybe, we splurge on experiences, food, travel and art.
For now, I have a ring to wear on my wedding day. It is pretty. I don’t know if it’s perfect. But, it works. I can always get a new one later. Most emotions and memories fade and wither away. Disappointment/regret/any sadness causing emotion are as fleeting as any happiness causing emotion and maybe even happiness/sadness is only attributed because our perception of what’s a positive and negative thing. Increasingly it seems to me that positives and negatives are quite interchangeable. Probably, it’s just how you see it.
“I was smitten and happy with the ring within ten minutes of seeing it. I was elated. I kept checking again and again after I bought it and started to observe more and more flaws. It was the same thing but my emotions moved from one end of the range to another.”